Words can hurt.
Many of us grew up with the saying, “Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words can never hurt you.” Unfortunately, this saying is one of the biggest lies we tell ourselves—a shield we use to deny our pain, to refuse ourselves the right to feel. Not just to feel happiness, joy, anxiety, or pain, but to feel life itself.
We have conditioned ourselves to believe that words hold no power over us so that we don’t have to acknowledge their sting. Yet, despite our efforts to dismiss them, words can leave us feeling worthless, ashamed, and full of regret. We lose ourselves in our own thoughts, paralyzed by our silence, convincing ourselves that no one cares. Because if we were to believe that someone does care, then our current realities—our pain, our suffering—might seem unjustified, without meaning or purpose. We were taught as children to keep our struggles unspeakable, to internalize the idea that “no one knows my life.” And so, a false ideal of strength was born—or perhaps, a misunderstanding of weakness.
Someone I love dearly lost their voice years ago. So long ago, in fact, that I’m unsure if they would even recognize it now. I wonder if they would see themselves in the words they once spoke about their own life. But here’s the truth: weakness is not a character flaw. It is a road we all must walk, a rite of passage that leads us to uncover courage and, more importantly, grit.
You know grit, don’t you? That small, loose force that permeates your skin, sinking through fat and muscle, seeping into your bloodstream until it unlocks your very spirit. Grit forces you to feel what is real and lovely in this world. But before it can do that, it must first ride the stream of your tears. Only then can you peer through the thick, hazy fog of your pain and see the beauty woven within it.
You were never meant to push through pain as if it were an obstacle to be conquered. You were meant to sit in it, to immerse yourself like soaking in a hot spring, allowing it to envelop you until every ounce of suffering is drawn out, sweated away in an exhausting, painful love affair. And at the climax of this journey, you come to know yourself—truly know yourself—as you gaze upon your own life with absolution. What once felt like regret, shame, and worthlessness is transformed into your story of strength.
I want you to know that your pain is not the end; it is only the beginning. If only you choose to walk through it.
Be blessed.
